I dreamt last night of intruders dressed in dark robes and masks; only to find upon closer inspection that such masks were merely poorly applied paint, and that I was in fact wearing one too.
We speak often of authenticity – of bravely and boldly embodying our true self.
Speaking our truth, acting from within a place of integrity, embracing our individuality in the face of conformity and an all too easy blending in with the majority.
Yet what if we aren’t quite sure who we are or what our true voice sounds like?
What if we don’t feel so uniquely different, if we can't quite identify a definite and distinctive rhythm within?
What if our sense of self seems somewhat subtler and harder to define?
Such a cry for authenticity might feel less like liberation and more like a nagging pressure, prompting panic as to whether we’re really operating in ways that align with who we are deep down inside.
Perhaps it's when we mistakenly view authenticity as equating to something stable, solid, immovable that such pressure begins to build.
I must 'find myself', a coherent, cohesive, easy-to-understand ‘thing’ – or else I have failed.
Should we approach such truth seeking in a different way, with an awareness of our truth as beautifully fluid, shape-shifting somewhat as we grow and evolve, pulling apart and joining together in sacred dance across time and space, then we are far more likely to step into the liberation, ease and peace we’re searching for.
For our Soul Voice and our Sacred Truth is forever expansive, shifting and changing and growing as we travel, day by day.
The core of who we are – our values, our beliefs, the way in which we feel our way through remain somehow consistent in many ways – while our message may transform and evolve as we do.
For who is one thing forever, but rather a kaleidoscope of colours?
Our interests, opinions, understandings unfurling and spiralling and creating new tones as we go, a constant and fluid revelation.
Less pressure, then, to remove a mask we can’t quite seem to identify, to reveal a clean, easy to understand face beneath.
Instead, a willingness to be led by our guiding values while opening our hearts to kernels of creativity residing within at any given moment in time.
In this very moment, then, whatever it is that aligns is my truth.
Whatever calls to be spoken, made, shared is my truth.
Following through, embracing my options, being accountable and holding space for myself and others is my truth.
Perhaps such truth will look one way today and quite another tomorrow, contradictions at the core of our being.
Not fickle or flaky, because our inner guidance works carefully to support us in a process of alignment, always; but open to change, to sacred evolution, to moments of unknowing and relearning, shedding and growing, birthing and deathing.
Who am I, then, at my very core?
Where does my authenticity reside?
I am my authenticity, contradictions and paradoxes and a willingness to ask myself “does this feel good, does this bring joy, does this support my recognition of the oneness that we all are and the love that threads throughout?” and to take action accordingly.
For my song is the only song worth singing, just as your song is the only song worth singing.
Notes shifting, perhaps, but always beautiful in their unique, heartfelt sacred sound.